Don't you send me to vm
Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Randomize
