I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
