Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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