i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
