jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Randomize
