I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
It's blow job season.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Randomize
