one might say we're banned from that church
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
