youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
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