It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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