She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Randomize