i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Randomize
