I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
