You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize