Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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