we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Randomize
