I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
