so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
