if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
