You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Randomize
