so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
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