Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
operation harelip BJ is a go
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Randomize
