I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
She even gives head with a lisp.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
