how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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