i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
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