I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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