just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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