JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
