I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Randomize
