Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
