she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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