after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize