I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Randomize
