I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
