you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize