I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
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