Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
You are a genius and a whore.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize