marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize