i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Randomize
