Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
