Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
