No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
