is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
So vagazzling was a success
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