Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
