Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
