Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Randomize
