do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
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