im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
