Yo dont text me then not text me
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
The Olympian is in my bed
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
