I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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