yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Randomize
