The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
